Daily Digest for 2010-01-31

Posted by Richard Mankhey

twitter (feed #3) 11:23pm rmankhey posted 24 tweets on Twitter. (Show Details)
  • @JeremyHawking I’m ready, willing and all that stuff.
  • You can manage chaos; it just takes a lot of processing.
  • @nfloresy You win! Totally a quote from Adventures in Babysitting! I. Love. You. For getting that.
  • Omg.
  • http://twitgoo.com/crgb6
  • @lilwolf30 It’s A. Maze. Ing.
  • RT @lilwolf30 Gotta find myself again and get to where I want to be or ill never be happy..time is up for this shadow of who I was!
  • @kelkel926 I know, but tell that to my .6 BAC level.
  • I will not leave New Orleans without singing the blues. And by blues I mean karaoke.
  • RT @USFBull82 I’ve had 8 drinks today and its only 8:30. #NOLA @bobalouie // What happens in NOLA gets on Twitter!
  • I want an Australian husband. Specifically the two I just had an extended conversation with.
  • @JeremyHawking Let it ride. :-)
  • I just discovered a casino 2 blocks from my hotel. Why, yes, I am feeling lucky.
  • @John_Irvine This is why I’m a homosexual. #hisandhistowels
  • Gin Blossoms is a good choice for a Bourbon Street karaoke bar, right? #staightpeoplelikethatshtuff
  • New Orleans is awesome, yet somehow this has been the most undebaucherous weekend of my life. #imdoingitwrong
  • @MichaThom Another reason you rock!
  • I love the smell of horses.
  • @DCbigpappa @MarkDC @DCJono I ended up doing "Hey Jealousy". The straights went wild.
  • @nfloresy I’ve hit em all already! I’ll ley you know!
  • RT @SuDeepe @bobalouie "no body gets out of here without singing the blues" // I knew you’d get that reference, Mom. Ha!
  • It says ‘hand warmer’ but it feels pretty good in my briefs.
  • I just got me a lotta beads in New Orleans; decent exposure is a requirement!
  • Instead of church I think I’ll check out "Bid Daddy’s House of World Famous Love Acts". Same thing right?

Daily Digest for 2010-01-30

Posted by Richard Mankhey

twitter (feed #3) 11:59pm rmankhey posted 37 tweets on Twitter. (Show Details)
  • Headed to Bourbon St. I should take out cash now while I still remember my PIN number.
  • http://twitgoo.com/conih
  • It’s chilly in Britney’s home state. I’m looking at palm trees and I can’t feel my scrotum.
  • @JeremyHawking New avatar! Nice. How can sugar hurt your tummy?
  • @kelkel926 It’s the witching hour, I guess. Speaking of witching, should I go get a Voodoo reading or something?
  • @KPCK I have no control when it comes to candy corn. RELATED: I weigh 400 pounds.
  • It’s 4:23 in the morning. Do you know where your alcoholic slurpees and pizza are? Oh! I’m eating them! @USFBull82
  • Fried Green Tomatoes. http://twitgoo.com/colzq
  • Over the teeth and past the gums, look out liver here it comes! #neworleans @USFBull82
  • @snoopysnowcone lol. Slippery when wet and hot when humid!
  • It’s true! http://twitgoo.com/cp5cj
  • Ooh la la. http://twitgoo.com/cp9b4
  • I just bought a 2010 calendar. So what if it came with a Playgirl magazine? Bonus!
  • @SuDeepe I coulda sworn I told you I put 4 days of debauchery on my social calendar…speaking of COPS, New Orleans is crawling with them.
  • "I wish I liked cocaine. No wait; that’s a bad statement." @USFBull82 #whathappensinneworleans
  • The bathroom wall told me 867-5309 is 2000 and late. 833-9904 is the new black.
  • Liquor store detour.
  • I love New Orleans. It’s so alive! By alive I mean noisy, drunken and debaucherous.
  • Limo acquired and on the way to the hotel blasting Ke$ha’s ‘Tik Tik’. How appropriate.
  • @SuDeepe I’m in New Orleans Mom, get with the program!
  • Beggin’ for beads. http://twitgoo.com/copqv
  • @DCbigpappa Then back to Oz then another bar and somehow I ended up with my own beads and then we watched the sun rise. Good times.
  • @DCBrent No, the latest edition with the "50 Hottest student ‘bodies’ of All Time". :-D
  • I did not plan on humidity. #humidityandcurlyhairdontmix http://twitgoo.com/cnxck
  • This shirt is only slightly inappropriate. http://twitgoo.com/cpbn8
  • @JuanluisPG Cheers indeed! A limo calls for champagne!
  • The two food groups. http://twitgoo.com/cpblv
  • Funny cuz it’s true? http://twitgoo.com/cpxts
  • It’s one of Newton’s Laws. http://twitgoo.com/cp09c
  • @actorgreg Yes! One of my favorites! My mom looks like Kathy Bates I think. Right @SuDeepe ?
  • Unsheath thy teats!!! #neworleans
  • That’s what you get for waking up in New Orleans.
  • @KPCK Those are my 3rd favorite right after Candy Corn and Gummi Worms!
  • Gummi Worms are the new coffee.
  • @kelkel926 I’m at K-Joes having dinner. It’s on Bourbon and Decatur I think. The waiter just gave me beads.
  • @kelkel926 No, babe, I’m only here for 4 days. I don’t think I could handle 2 weeks in NOLA.
  • @DCbigpappa All I can say is WOW! We went to some bar and threw beads at chicks, then Oz, then the bar across from it, then Rawhide…

Daily Digest for 2010-01-29

Posted by Richard Mankhey

twitter (feed #3) 11:37pm rmankhey posted 71 tweets on Twitter. (Show Details)
  • @SuDeepe I have no idea what FBFA means, but just go with it.
  • @DCBrent Have you checked your fuses recently? :-D
  • My hair is getting long enough to the point it’s getting curly. Is there such a thing as a curly mohawk?
  • Dear DC tweeps: Twitter Name Auto-Suggest is useless with y’alls having ‘DC’ in your names. I still love y’all though. Love, Bobalouie
  • @chrisbarrondc Well way to go. You just went and made my whole WEEK! @scottinstep
  • @Ryan_Please Edible?
  • ‘X’ marks the spot and I’m wearing TIC-TAC-TOE underwear.
  • @DupontDan I’m actually on my way to Cobalt. I had to pack for my NOLA trip. I will finally get to meet @DCdebbie.
  • The hardest thing about not checking luggage when traveling is paring down on Product. Yes, I capitalize it.
  • Hello and welcome new followers! Have some cheesy poofs. *passes the bag around*
  • I just boarded the plane to NOLA with @USFBull82 and his crazy law school b*tches. It’s like ‘Final Destination’.
  • You DC tweeps with the DC in you Twitter handle…makes autosuggest all that more difficult.
  • @chrisbarrondc :-D I didn’t win but everyone’s a winner, right? @ScottinStep
  • What is going through your beautiful head right now?
  • @ChuckGT I stand blushingly corrected. *bows*
  • @ScottinStep @chrisbarrondc A co-worker of mine told me they put sugar in the rice n’ bean mixture. #chipotle
  • @Ryan_Please Howdy, pardner! How’s tricks? @michathom
  • Airport shuttle. Our driver is Rod. http://twitgoo.com/cngxd
  • @chrisbarrondc :-) Thanks. I will attempt to twitpic any adventures.
  • @ChuckGT Yeah, that was me. #stalker
  • @ScottinStep Mmmmhmmm. And I’ve never danced shirtless at Cobalt (Best Package Contest doesn’t count). @chrisbarrondc
  • @kelkel926 I <3 Lisa Loeb!
  • @DupontDan All that is interesting except for the drinking part. That’s just superfluous.
  • The lunchbox has landed. @USFBull82, a gaggle of other crazy kids and I have arrived in New Orleans. Brace yourselves.
  • Am I the only one who thinks that a urinal that doesn’t flush is a bad idea? #zeroflush
  • @MichaThom :-) As you wish!
  • @kdawg1313 Sloppy kisses and sweet dreams!
  • @DupontDan I’m not.
  • @chrisbarrondc @ScottinStep I don’t know…I eat pretty much anything I want and I think everything’s all right enough.
  • @John_Irvine @genstarr @slummymummy9 I’m fine with VA, too. I live near Vienna Metro and don’t have a car, so take that into consideration.
  • @SuDeepe Even if they’re securely stowed and my hat doesn’t violate FBFA regulations?
  • My ears *pop* everytime the Metro goes under the Potomac from Rosslyn to Foggy Bottom. Owie!
  • "It’s just like ‘alegria’. So glad I got to feel ya." #lyricaltruths
  • @jesserker Thanks doll!
  • Tried and true friends can also have some Cheesy Poofs. DIG IN Y’ALL! @JeremyHawking
  • If I didn’t have herpes yet I have it now. #makingoutwithrandompeople
  • Wow. Epic tweetup at Cobalt. Too many to mention. Fab times, #dchomos.
  • @KimsCrackers For a second I thought you said a neighbor peed over your shoulder.
  • "You’re a dude. You’ll get felt up no matter what." #thingsheardoutsideofcobalt
  • Dilemma: Cab to the hotel or stretch limo?
  • @taco_heina Just scamming on squirrel, per usual. Natch.
  • @kelkel926 A buncha friends come down every year and invited me along for comic relief. It’s my 1st time here. :-D
  • Oh hello 66 degree weather. *handshake*
  • Let’s see how ginormous a piece of broccoli will fit into my mouth. #nomnomnom
  • @crystal431 What about Joe? My question is "What about Bob?"
  • Lies the airport tells. http://twitgoo.com/cnh52
  • @DCbigpappa 8 of us.
  • I’m off to New Orleans with @USFBull82. Woot! I’m crossing my fingers for a strip search at the airport.
  • I’m going to stop using the ‘word’ LOL. Instead I’m going to use the ‘word’ LAF; as in "Laughed And Farted".
  • @genstarr That’s my girl! Just making sure.
  • @Shermin8tor Thank you thank you! Have a great weekend!
  • @USFBull82 I fixed my ticket problem. I’m all set in seat 26E and checked-in. You’re not checking bags are you?
  • @MattyCDC Don’t be sorry, hon. Be happy! Why not, right?
  • @kdawg1313 @Chugs07 @cubby1978 Awww! I’m touched! But not hard enough. Touch like ya mean it!!!!!
  • @John_Irvine It won’t be so beautiful after that. I advise against it.
  • @kelkel926 I love love love it! I know all her music. I really like the songs "How" and "Do You Sleep". You have good taste!
  • @Ryan_Please *squeeee!*
  • @SuDeepe Hi Mom! i’m packin’! #thatswhathesaid
  • RT @Chugs07 @bobalouie @USFBull82 You 2 have fun!!!! // Thanks Chugsie!!
  • Dear Twitter.com: It is now 2010 in case you didn’t know. Change your website footer, stat. Love, RIchard
  • @Andrew703 Google’s link builder? Or something else?
  • @kelkel926 Stop! I’m getting all misty!
  • Tragedy! One of my 6-outlet electric strips has fried. I now have 6 gadgets/peripherals without power. UNRELATED: I have too many gadgets.
  • Oh the Midtown Gold’s Gym is fun. I’ll have to check Missed Connections tomorrow.
  • @Ryan_Please *ewww*
  • @declutteryou It’s closer to the truth, and LOL is entirely overused. I’m guilty myself.
  • @genstarr @slummymummy9 @John_Irvine Yeah, let’s tweet up! I’m game for sometime next week. Y/Y?
  • @ScottinStep Oh yeah. That could have something to do with it. @chrisbarondc
  • @ScottinStep I’m sure it’s fresh-tastic and all; personally I’m just not much for Mexican food.
  • Why do I always order a water with my beer? Beer always gets my full attention and the water goes undrunk.
  • @davbart So great to meet you in the flesh also, as it were.

Daily Digest for 2010-01-28

Posted by Richard Mankhey

twitter (feed #3) 10:17pm rmankhey posted 40 tweets on Twitter. (Show Details)
  • @MarkDC I picked a bad day to rely on the Red Line…of course that’d be anyday, wouldn’t it?
  • @lwilcher I know THAT’S right!
  • @nfloresy Katie does look great with them. How do you know *you* don’t? Ever tried?
  • My NT-friend Joy and I with Kathy Griffin: http://twitgoo.com/clw0w
  • @chrisbarrondc That’s semi-evil. Speaking of alternative forms of birth control, did you here about that whole Tim Teebo thing?
  • @sianyrobinson *giggles* Point taken. #yikes
  • @g3rd80 I hear that song in my head everytime I wash my hands. Like, once a month.
  • I’m beginning to think I should’ve worn underwear today. Hmm. Maybe I can fashion some out of my scarf. #mcguyver
  • @LiLQueenBee88 Angled bangs are sassy!
  • It was not my intention to get lost in Silver Spring. #countrymouse
  • Off with their heads! Oh, too late. http://twitgoo.com/clt37
  • @OneFineJay Whatevs! You certainly are jolly!
  • http://twitgoo.com/cm0cg
  • @Prof_Alec_Smart It runs in the family, I’m afraid. I think it runs faster in *your* family, however. ;-P
  • @DCJono I’m flattered.
  • @OneFineJay I, for one, try to avoid unhappy, fat people.
  • RT @lwilcher @bobalouie we’re in the same boat…..the one w/o underwear. // Is it a three hour cruise or the Love Boat?
  • @DCBrent @lwilcher Hello sailors, new in town?
  • A co-worker just informed me that she takes me on client visits because I provide comic relief and eye candy. O rly?
  • @LegalMoose Well I *did* put my mascara on this morning. Chicks dig eyelashes.
  • So sending kinky text messages is called "sexting". What do you call it when you send kinky tweets?
  • @pjohnson360 Hmmm…I think I’ll call it "twittilating", me thinks. @LegalMoose @lilwolf30
  • @ELJefe843 I’m working but off-site at a photoshoot for my company. It’s all models! Clothes! Fashion! Fashion! Fashion, sweetie darling!
  • If you’re going to go commando, do it with pants that have buttons. #theressomethingaboutmary
  • @kdawg1313 Thanks doll! I’m feeling less like upchuucking already!
  • @chrisbarrondc Shhhhh…don’t tell anyone they’re wigs. It’s our little secret.
  • Less is more. And by ‘less’ I mean naked.
  • @ELJefe843 None of the above. That’s how I roll. Gauchely.
  • @Ryan_Please The 5 second rule doesn’t apply to tweets.
  • Question for the ladies: What’s your feeling on rocking bangs? Are heavy bangs a good look?
  • My socks don’t match and it’s on purpose. Whatcha gonna do about it?
  • @pjohnson360 #twitterafterdark eh? Well what about those naughty tweets sent during daylight hours? Not that I *do* that…
  • @yococomo I’m told I need duct tape (@JustTerry) so when I get some I can take pics of my scarfy, duct tape sumo diaper.
  • Everytime I look at a faucet I get that Katy Perry song stuck in my head.
  • Every time I see #SOTU I secretly think #STFU. I can’t help it.
  • @chrisbarrondc The carnage is unspeakable!
  • @Ryan_Please Oh go ahead and stick it in your mouth anyway.
  • @USFBull82 No, I’m not. I’m asking a genuine question because I’m having an argument with a friend. Lol.
  • My left hand doesn’t know what my right hand is doing but it’s probably better that way.
  • @DistrictOfRyan @drgatewood Heck yeah! A little shorter than the real one I’d say; and I think he’s been sneaking glances at my tweets.

Daily Digest for 2010-01-27

Posted by Richard Mankhey

facebook (feed #1) 12:13am rmankhey updated their status on Facebook.
Richard is old enough to get into trouble.
twitter (feed #3) 3:58pm rmankhey posted 132 tweets on Twitter. (Show Details)
  • "I’m so two-thousand and ten you’re so two-thousand and"…then?
  • @SuDeepe I just looked at Saundra’s pics on Facebook and threw up in my mouth a LOT. #yurk
  • Oh well…@g3rd80 and @ScottinStep picked an interesting night to come to EFN Loungw. #poznight
  • @BeachBarista I may have grown up without a beach but I did see the Aurora Borealis frequently. And tornadoes.
  • @Chugs07 All you can eat…wings?
  • I don’t presume innocence but I do like to pretend from time to time.
  • Houseguests are not appreciating being molested. My work here is done. DC here I come!
  • @lilwolf30 How ’bout something like you come to my place, we order Chinese and play RockBand (on xBox or Wii)?
  • @SuDeepe :-) So I just realized something…’Cierra’ is like ‘Ciara’ and ‘Aleigha’ is like ‘Alliyah’. See a pattern?
  • @Jase11 Exactly. I let others do the dirty work and get my updates through Twitter.
  • I’m glad I ventured out for random adventures with @DCJason @boogdogDC @scottinstep and @g3rd80 last night. Good lads all ’round!
  • @davbart I have secret powers you’re not aware of. I save money & time chugging soup for dinner. But my sodium levels… @markdc @Andrew703
  • @Jase11 Stop being a victim and piss them off right back! Turn about is fair play as long as it involves pepper spray.
  • @jpjaramillo Okay, you are cleared to wear the outfit. But only if you come out with me for karaoke and sing some Nancy Sinatra.
  • High Five!!! http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/2009/08/whaleBAR_450×592.jpg
  • @Jase11 Oh, I’m well aware of that. I’m reminded daily but I allow people their moments of impropriety because I’m anything but perfect.
  • @singulardc I usually just get mayflies; typical lifespan of 30 minutes to one day. @Ty_DC
  • RT @Jimbo3DC: saw Legion last night, which was like Terminator but with mean angels instead of robots. The acting and writing kinda sucked.
  • @jpjaramillo "Estas Botas Son Para Caminar!!" Love it! You’d be simply irresistibler with hair like that.
  • @Ryan_Please That pretty much sums up my entire philosophy in life with 3 words. Well done.
  • @chrisbarrondc I don’t understand how people can tweet and run at the same time. My prodigious sweat would short out my phone. @DCdebbie
  • @MarioPadilla Just okayish? What you need is some Nitrous Oxide. Works wonders for me!
  • @lilwolf30 Great! So what are you doing tomorrow evening? :-)
  • @SuDeepe Oh! You were paying attention to the Twitterwebz while I was badmouthing you? Bad Mom!
  • @Ryan_Please Apparently the word ‘vagina’ activates @KegelFairy who is secretly Dwayne Johnson. #sogay
  • @ELJefe843 Headed into DC. I live within spitting distance of Vienna Metro.
  • Fun under the cover of darkness has its price.
  • @DistrictOfRyan It’s a useful technique I have to remind myself to use sparingly.
  • @lilwolf30 Yay! It’s a date!
  • Love is a battlefield, and I’m locked and loaded.
  • @slummymummy9 :-) If they knew how the heck to use Twitter they would; everyone around here calls me "Miss Dick".
  • @kdawg1313 I haven’t had a nap since I was in kindergarten.
  • I sometimes feel I’m missing out by not having cable TV but I know I’m really not. I have other addictions.
  • @chrisbarrondc They aren’t unhappy. They’re just stoic.
  • One of my housemates is having friends over. I will now don my robe and attempt to molest the guests.
  • RT @SuDeepe @bobalouie Whoa doggies! How can I resist that charm! // You can’t. Don’t try. Mmmmhmmmm.
  • @SuDeepe Just do it.
  • @jesserker *bows* I am humbled, pulchritudinous one.
  • @ChuckGT Ask and you shall receive!
  • Nothing to see here. Let’s find out what’s going on on the PuppyCam.
  • RT @jonesy77 What’s with the Savage Garden bashing tonight @A_Ron_The_DJ @bobalouie??? // I know, right?
  • Is "bringing home a new baby" the same as "bringing home the bacon"?
  • @BeachBarista I’m not sure if anyone ever called a tornado ‘cute’. Think of them as ‘bite-sized’ hurricanes.
  • @Ty_DC Perhaps my criteria are too stringent. #hardtoplease
  • @JosieDC Lol. Thanks for the ReTweet!
  • @ScottinStep Oh gurl! I’m here. Gonna buzz you shortly. #ifyouknowwhatimean
  • @Ty_DC Because I have a high threshold for butterflies.
  • RT @boogdogDC can I just Sayn : @bobalouie is a handsome, sweeet gentleman who knows how to romance a man
  • @jjherrick Honestly, the last show I watched consistently was "Home Improvement" when I was a junior in high school.
  • @MarioPadilla :-) Oddly enough the Earth is actually closer to the sun during Winter. Okay, I’m done now.
  • @DistrictOfRyan I’m glad. I have several other operating modes, some of which include dancing badly and vacuuming.
  • @chrisbarrondc If by "Republican" you mean…oh never mind. I can’t say it. My mom’s on Twitter.
  • @Djewelle :-D If you think I’m crazy, you should check out @slummymummy9 @snoopysnowcone @Ryan_Please @meaganhtfld @genstarr @danhans and..
  • @jpjaramillo Naw. Simpsons did it.
  • And now I will practice positive visualization that I will upchuck on the shoes of my Prince Charming tonight.
  • @luvzgambit No dice, toots. You are too far gone for it to be effective. Go gambling with what you would’ve spent on therapy.
  • RT @debihope I had a whole conversation about bacon with my coworkers today. It was just like Twitter, but with people. Ugh.
  • @mikesica You’re at Cobalt?
  • @urbanphish Isn’t that called e-mail?
  • @kdawg1313 *giggles* I *still* don’t know left from right but the milk and graham crackers were pretty good, eh?
  • @davesilverstone I am not (wo)man enough for NYC.
  • @davbart All of the above.
  • @chrisbarrondc Paralox is so funny. And the one where Eddy gets Saffie to flash her rack at Paris (city not the trainwreck socialite).
  • "Correction: this is the Orange Line train to Vienna. Thank you for riding Metro." Don’t you know what train you’re on, Mr. Conductor?
  • @ELJefe843 Probably DIK. #karaoke But I am open to suggestion.
  • RT @DCJason At @EFN_Lounge with @bobalouie @ScottinStep @TheCullen1 @g3rd80 @russcolbourne yay!
  • @DCdebbie Girls don’t sweat. Or fart.
  • Dear Formspring: Die. Love, Richard
  • @MarkDC I just made dinner. It involved the arduous process of opening a can of ‘Chickarina’ soup and eating it cold. @davbart
  • @lilwolf30 Hey sexy mama (she’s not really a mother; it’s a euphemism people)!! What are you doing tomorrow? Karaoke at Sobe perhaps?
  • @chrisbarrondc That is freakin’ adorable! I once named a horse after my tumbling instructor, Mrs. McNiff.
  • Remember David Archuleta? Yeah, me neither.
  • @SuDeepe Mom, my friends want to follow you on Twitter. Let them. You’re welcome.
  • So you want to stand with me on the mountain? Sorry, I’m afraid of heights.
  • @Chugs07 What would you like?
  • @genstarr Don’t you mean gynechiatrists?
  • @ChuckGT Be gentle though! I only have 2!
  • @DistrictOfRyan A very foreign one at that!
  • @DistrictScott I’m totally kidding. I’m going to both unfollow and BLOCK your crazy booty.
  • @g3rd80 Vodka it is. @jesserker I’ll bring some KC! @Djewelle Hot! @DupontDan Wow!! @ScottinStep Good choice!
  • I’m in search of a less bleak playground; I need to pedal faster.
  • @Andrew703 Good suggestion, but I’m not looking tonight. :-) #manhuntreference
  • @chrisbarrondc Bonjour! How’d your writing go yesterday? Did your Muse make an appearance?
  • @lilwolf30 Okay! I will let you know, though I think 8:30 is a good guess!
  • RT @DCJason In the A5 with @ScottinStep @bobalouie @russcolbourne // It’s a crazy ride!!
  • @BeachBarista I grew up on a farm in Kansas. Beaches are a myth.
  • You see!? *This* is what happens when you don’t protect your tweets. Your mom starts following you.
  • @DistrictOfRyan Do you mean how far it would travel if it were thrown?
  • Dear @SuDeepe: Blood sugar low. Stop. Please send candy corn. Stop. Love, Snookie
  • I have a dilemma: Stay home tonight & tweet until bed or go out in DC, sit in a bar and tweet until I have to go to bed?
  • RT @Djewelle Driving through the hood blasting the pokemon theme song. #KingShit // Omgosh, now who’s the funny one?
  • RT @KegelFairy: Don’t forget to kegel! RT @snoopysnowcone: @bobalouie @ryan_please death by vagina #newdesserts // omgwtfbbq?
  • @ScottinStep That’s tempting…but only if you put out the rubber sheets!
  • @Andrew703 Oh I am. I will look but not touch.
  • http://twitgoo.com/cjfkm
  • @LegalMoose To ask that babies are cured correctly is such "a modest proposal".
  • @MichaThom You need to eat! Get delivery. Or DiGiorno. But it’s not delivery, it’s DiGiorno. Wait, I’m confused now…
  • @Shermin8tor I like the way you think, young one. :-)
  • @chrisbarrondc If you travel with some Metamucil you can rule out 33% of all possible options.
  • @MarioPadilla I’m great, thanks! I had a wonderful day and am feeling like a Million Dollar Bill ("Oh oh woh woh woh"). How are you?
  • RT @DCJason The boys @bobalouie @boogdogDC http://mypict.me/3eZ2E
  • RT @whoisRobertHart Laugh at yourself once in a while; give yourself a break ~ Greg Evans // How ’bout a Kit Kat bar?
  • @sandypants88 Accounting is good for you. It’ll put hair on your breas…I mean chest.
  • @kdawg1313 That’s interesting. I got a lot of "you’re not right because we’ve never heard that answer before, but you’re not wrong either".
  • @A_Ron_The_DJ Yeah, I offered to sit on his lap but he said something about a radioactive prostate.
  • @ChuckGT I will require you to sign a waiver.
  • @Djewelle@John_Irvine. They have a comic genius that could only be born of pure insanity.
  • I, for one, am looking forward to Valentine’s Day. I love being reminded I’ve been single for 8 years and counting.
  • @luvzgambit That’s a bit extreme. I usually burn my chocolate Easter bunnies in effigy.
  • @SuDeepe Just let them follow you. It’s for the best.
  • Dear Richard: You are 1 tweet from being terminated. Love, Your Employers #ohsnapBBL
  • @ScottinStep You are so accommodating!
  • @chrisbarrondc Stoic, constipated or unhappy? Surely the gamut of emotions you allow humans cannot be so small?
  • @MarioPadilla Because the Earth is 147,300,000 km from the sun and the Northern Hemisphere is tilted away from it. #omgshutuprichard
  • @5windows He does have a nice voice but I think he was swallowed by the Hollywood machinery.
  • @elmonte09 Omg somebody finally got it! I love you!
  • @BeachBarista If you were a *real* man you could frolick skimpily regardless of the temperature.
  • RT @ScottinStep @bobalouie are u going #1 or #2? // All of the above.
  • I just saw a plain clothes Santa at Vienna Metro Station. Eat it, NORAD Santa Tracker!
  • I need to eat more than a can of soup for dinner. Campbells just doesn’t cut it. *gnaws on arm*
  • @JosieDC I have not yet had the distinct pleasure of making @DCdebbie ’s acquaintance.
  • @A_Ron_The_DJ At least the Savage Garden version. Cascada did a good cover.
  • @kdawg1313 I used to teach at an environmental learning center in Minnesota & we’d teach the kids how to "pretend" to sleep. Lies!
  • @SuDeepe "African-American songstress names" for $1000, Alex.
  • @DistrictScott Okay, I’m unfollowing you now.
  • @Ryan_Please Some of them *do* have teeth. #omgthatsgross
  • Someday I want to ride the metro from end to end with a bottle o’ Jack and do a shot at each station. Who’s w/ me?!
  • @yococomo Ditto. But on *some* I also like to superimpose the body of Penelope Cruz to make it bearable.
  • @DistrictOfRyan You forgot your ‘Modesty’ mode. Or is it ‘Self-Deprecation’? I confuse those all the time (but use them frequently).
  • @DCdebbie I look forward to the first time we meet (minus the Dutch-Oven). @Chugs07
  • @jpjaramillo You’d give J.Simp a run for her money!
  • @SuDeepe Aunt Terry is a close second. :-)

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