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Daily Digest for 2010-06-10

Posted by Richard Mankhey

	1:28pm	rmankhey updated their status on Facebook. Richard cannot comprehend the fervor surrounding a bunch of soccer balls.
	11:06pm	rmankhey posted 82 tweets on Twitter. (Show Details) If I don’t have the energy to stay awake on the bus, how will I make it through an 8 mile run? Oh hello, No Doz(TM)! @skunkhair Bearing the full brunt of the vocoder-Bieber nightmare that is currently on stage? God bless you. @nolageek …and how is that different from any other day? Contrary to the popular Joe Nichols song, tequila did NOT make my clothes fall off last night. I want a refund. @PrttyGriselda Corny would be my middle name if it weren’t already William. If I ever have children I want their names to be palandromes. There are a lot of dirty words out there, but for me, "S.O.P" is the dirtiest of them all. @jesserker Hey pretty mama! @SnoopDannyDan You forgot ‘teratoma’. @Jamberta We’re all heroes, according to ourselves. @DistrictOfAris Yer doin’ it rite. When coworkers send an email without a Subject Line they shouldn’t be surprised that I ignore them. @willgallahue Why do you have to get all up in my grill with your "silver lining" bull-pucky? @SnoopDannyDan I knew someone would joke about that, but I didn’t expect it from a straight dude. Kudos! @whosthatgirl2 Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind some Foursquare on Twitter, it’s just when people check-in at bus stops…constantly… @OneFineJay I’m afraid you got me thinking beyond the scope of your questions…what IS 9 minutes of life these days? Geminis come with instructions, right? I can’t find my user manual & I need to justify my actions. @SoCalMeeka Yes indeed! @Jase11 You’re quite welcome! I will continue following you for a few more days. wink wink @davbart For real, though. I’m looking for Lance. @boogdogDC Some are more possessive than others. @skunkhair Well at least NSuck was able to keep all their members together. giggles* "members" @stinsgrl97 @Jase11 It depends on your smartphone and application, but yes, it’s possible to not post a Foursquare checkin to Twitter. @Jase11 Foursquare away, baby! RELATED: I have some unfollowing to do. @Jamberta Sing me some more Bette Midler, please. It soothes my eczema. @skunkhair Wait, what? I totally DMed you…didn’t I? I think I forgot to brush my teeth this morning. Can someone come check for me? opens mouth @BRIHOMO Thanks for the ReTweet! @Andrew703 That’s true…but unfortunately Seesmic on my phone doesn’t have such a filter. @PrttyGriselda bows w/ as much grace as he can manage Thank you, my pretty! Catastrophes are, by definition, terrible. I bet if I reached around and felt my back I’d have a sign that says "BIG FAT SLACKER" taped to it. @DCJono Sharpies are disappointingly unaromatic; also, I’ve never tried sniffing a glue stick. @OneFineJay I feel like I don’t even need to watch it now after that vivid portraiture. @gaypornfanatic White people hair? Ha! Mine is curly by default and I have to fight it w/ a flat iron & product. I like it though. @davbart I’m as capable of doing math in my head as I am explaining heaven to bears. @boogdogdc @dcjono @INAHAM730 Yes. Just chop of the ‘usewife’. Does anyone know anything about the new "Facebook Credits" thing? @pockettpatrick Junkie. @Chugs07 "Cheesy" is a compliment for their coats. Wolf Trap is always a friendly place…especially around 10:30 pm when the collective BAC is about 423.14. @gaypornfanatic It is! Whaddaya think? Be honest. For real…can I just hear "I Want it That Way" so I can go? I have multiple personalities to blame my foibles on. As a Gemini I can’t ever decide which one to blame. Even with the all the balls involved I don’t find myself getting excited about the World Cup. @Jase11 I have no reply to that clever and well-worded response. Cheers! @JosieDC That’s not the only thing that hurts. I bet a fork in the larynx would be most unpleasant as well. @MarioSemiglia Can you teach me how to do it properly? I’ll supply the tequila. @John_Irvine Both dangerously impressionable groups. I need to watch it. Thanks for keeping me in check, bro. @boogdogDC I don’t know about the bears, but that’s the heaven I want to live in. @dcjono @davbart @skunkhair Dude! I’m at the BSB concert too! Lawn seats. Where are you? @claddah76 No. @TextuallyAktive Neither is 30 as far as I can tell. Happy Birthday! @sandypants88 I’m here! Lawn seats! Where are you? NPR used "Tik Tok" as one of their song snippets between news storied this morning. Kudos, NPR. At its best, life is like a beer commercial; at its worst, like a Justin Bieber song. @DCBrent I thought I felt something. RT @Favstar_Bot: @bobalouie, 3 Favs! http://favstar.fm/users/bobalouie/status/15853416909?a=m // 3 whole Favs! fans self @davbart I can spell "hello" on the calculator. Isn’t that what it’s for? @boogdogDC @dcjono @JosieDC It wasn’t my throat that was the intended destination for the fork. @skunkhair Women can read? Maybe people will stop using Foursquare when it becomes self-aware. What time is it? Oh…that time of day where I regret pissing my day away on Twitter & actually do stuff. BBL @PrttyGriselda It was exactly the way I wanted it…you know…I wanted it that way. In other words…awesome! @OneFineJay I still haven’t seen that video. Is it worth my time? @DCJono Hannah…um…Elle…uh… @davbart @JosieDC Thanks Josie! I invested in a flat iron. It works wonders! RT @stinsgrl97: @bobalouie you must mean nsuck. // That only applies to Lance Bass, technically. (Self) Studies have shown you get a different high sniffing highlighters than you do sniffing markers. I can’t stop laughing at how freakin’ cheesy the Backstreet Boys look dancing like they think they’re NSync. @John_Irvine Pray harder, Brother John! RT @OneFineJay: @chrisbarrondc ooh intriguing! Um. Link? In secret? Via DM? // Dude, I was thinking the same thing. @DCHotland Thanks, cutie. Remind me how much I told you I’d pay you to tweet nice things about me. @JosieDC RT @Jase11: I’m fat b/c a smaller body couldn’t contain all this greatness. // The skinnies take umbrage with this tweet. @PrttyGriselda giggles I’m sure you do know. Cheeky! RT @skunkhair: Just met the spectacular @bobalouie at a BSB concert. If that’s not the gayest thing you’ve read tonite I don’t know what is. @boogdogDC Definitely Jessica. How many of these 7 Disney movie sexual innuendos have you seen?: http://bit.ly/9zYXC9 I cannot WAIT until people learn to check-in to Foursquare without posting it to Twitter. @boogdogDC I’m not sure, but oddly enough I’m craving antipasto. @DCJono This rabbit needs a carrot to make this 8 mile run. I’ll pretend Bradley Cooper is waiting at the end….in his birthday suit. We really do need more songs about unrequited love…don’t we?

Daily Digest for 2010-06-09

Posted by Richard Mankhey

	10:55am	rmankhey updated their status on Facebook. Richard falls for that silly inertia trick everytime. Thanks Universe.
	11:34pm	rmankhey posted 20 tweets on Twitter. (Show Details) @zaneology You are doing irrepairable harm to your body. People that walk with Nordic ski poles are going the extra mile to look like nincompoops. @DCBrent Dangit, Brent. I can only handle so much poking. @singulardc I blame your mom. @Cumdumpster2000 I’m just a moron, as per usual. Carry on. @DCBrent Then you must have heard correctly…if it was the Crew Club. When we all laughed and nervously changed the subject, someone revealed they had photos of the whole incident. RT @MarkDC: @Chugs07 @bobalouie @DrGatewood @DCHotland awesome! Big tweetup // …and @DCJono too! It is reversed. I didn’t want to just use the same exact picture as on FB. About to rock out with his Domo out: http://twitgoo.com/z4uwy If Lindsay Lohan keeps setting off her SCRAM bracelet she won’t be making any sucktastic movies for a while. Bummer. @yancito Precisely. First things first! @boogdogDC We’ll have to wait until he fully emerges from his cocoon to find out. …My avi that is. #ijustdirectmessagedalloftwitter @Jamberta Yes. Sometimes, when I get up in the morning, I think, "This must be what it feels like to be 127 years old." Sometimes trying to keep up with Facebook activity/messages/likes/pokes/etc. is like a 2nd job. @crackliffe It’s easier not to bother with the unmentionables at all. How many Backstreet Boys does it take to screw in a light bulb? You always seem to hear about "Top News Stories" but never anything about "Bottom News Stories". I smell a conspiracy.

Daily Digest for 2010-06-08

Posted by Richard Mankhey

	11:50am	rmankhey updated their status on Facebook. Richard ordered his Tuesday with a Super-Sized side of glitter.
	10:29pm	rmankhey posted 87 tweets on Twitter. (Show Details) @SugarBoobs Hello Beautiful Stranger! @MichaThom "Behold" or "Show me your privates, please." Any dream will do. @kelkel926 The answer is: Hells to the NO! @MichaThom Behold! The power of the Magic Word! @A_Ron_The_DJ I haven’t heard of it so it must be cool. Ima wish Kanye West a Happy 33rd Birthday. @kelkel926 Unless one is a cover model for a fitness magazine there is a good chance Jillian Michaels could do some good. @DCbigpappa I don’t take appointments. Just walk on in! @DCdebbie So studies show that lesbians raise boring children? @davidisnotright …or you can just find someone with bigger hands. @5windows …and I was just going for being a dick. I think I succeeded marvelously. @boogdogDC If I didn’t know better I’d say you were rehearsing. @JBizzleRox OMG Happy Birfday Mr. President! I would like my Tuesday served with a Super-Sized side of glitter, please. @SoCalMeeka Abracadabra! jazz hands @Jamberta With a booty like this, who could resist? http://twitgoo.com/z0768 Time to fall gracelessly into bed. G’night sexy tweeps! @lwilcher I play to my strengths #ifyouknowwhatimean I’ll do this later when more people are awake, but you just gotta follow @Whiskey_Dad. You won’t regret it. @kelkel926 I wouldn’t mind meeting one of those myself. I’ll keep my eyes peeled for ya, doll. @SuDeepe is happy my moobs (man boobs) are enhancing my social life. Thanks, Mom. @jesserker True…but I should be careful about Ashlee Simpson-Wentz…Pete might try to come over and emo me to death. @Hot_Pocket By the way…Best. Twitter. Handle. Ever. Either my tweets suck or my followers don’t know how to Favorite tweets. Or both. This whole "wearing a cowboy hat out to the gay bars" thing is working out well. Didn’t pay for a drink all night! @DCdebbie By ‘boring’ I meant ‘unobstreperous’. It wasn’t meant to be cruel. @gaypornfanatic Woohoo! It doesn’t taste nearly as good as it looks. It’s good God knows his Latin. Lucifer wouldn’t be nearly as menacing with a name like ‘Courtney’. I exposed myself to several patrons at the Green Lantern last night. Well…they did ask nicely. @matthewarchman I am humbled. Gracias. I also have it on good authority that @asherhuey wears a wig. @Whiskey_Dad Tweetdeck’s dictionary sucks a big one. I have Merriam-Webster.com on speed dial. RT @chrisgeidner: @bobalouie "And Richard said unto the mohawk, ‘Let it be parted.’ And it was." // <— Favorited RT @Jamberta: @bobalouie I generally only "favorite" when celebrities tweet @ me // Define "celebrity". Lavendar is a wonderful color…unless it’s in your stool. This is what a Lazy Mohawk Day looks like: http://yfrog.com/7er4frj @Jamberta Of course not, honey. We’ve taken baths together! There’s a She Wolf in the bathroom and I really have to pee. @SoCalMeeka I’ll have a Sharpie on my person just for the occasion! I’m not sure if I tied this towel correctly. Ladies? http://twitgoo.com/yzacp When someone says they love you "warts and all" they weren’t talking about genital warts. RT @5windows: wierd… // Even weirder is how you spell ‘weird’. @kelkel926 My pleasure, darling. @asherhuey Precisely. Yours is awesome and mine is a broke-ass weave. @matthewarchman RT @kelkel926: @bobalouie lovely! & better… We have very similar glasses! http://twitpic.com/1m92m3 // You are so beautiful! @Hot_Pocket blushes We’ll leave out the particulars of my sucking…but thank you for the compliment! @kelkel926 Yes! Check out: http://www.favstar.me RT @jasonmustian: Chamillionaire is BY FAR my favorite wealthy animal rapper. Chinchillionaire and Duck Billionaired Platypus are also good. RT @lwilcher: @ELJefe843 ok thats fucking random. // That describes about 90% of all tweets. @Emarieg assumes bad Lurch imitation You rang? @edmontongreg I DO hope you’ll let me know when the jury is done deliberating. Ashlee Simpson-Wentz is dead, right? I’m so bad at that "Dead Celebrity" game. @gaypornfanatic Oh, I’m quite cognizant of that. >:-) @gaypornfanatic It’s okay. There are plenty of other things to put in my mouth. DC Metro lines listed in order of SUCK (greatest to greatest): http://twitgoo.com/z0nbr @gaypornfanatic I won’t apologize for having a huge…vocabulary. @jesserker I should stop making light of sensitive subjects. @SoCalMeeka I get on streaks sometimes. I’m also fond of streaking. @MichaThom Do! I’m not just whistlin’ "Dixie" here. @JBizzleRox But of course! wink @willgallahue It’s funny you mention that because I actually worked up a sweat Salsa dancing last night. @Hot_Pocket bows deeply and curtsies for good measure You’re quite welcome! It’s Salsa time (at Cobalt)! RT @DCJono: @bobalouie http://www.foxtrot.com/2010/06/06062010/ @SuDeepe // Mom? Is that you? (Yes, it is) @gaypornfanatic Wait, what? Real cowboys wear lip gloss. @jesserker Are you around this weekend? RT @John_Irvine: @bobalouie 37 blue. Hostiles in the pineapple patch? // www.google.com @matthewarchman No I haven’t seen ‘Alejandro’ yet. I like to delay gratification. @Emarieg Your Dr. Evil laughter is decidedly and creepily spot on. @Nock4Six Thanks, babe! A little towel humor goes a long way! I believe I just found a urinal cake on the sidewalk. I get a prize for that, right? Bradley Cooper is composed of 110% de-licious. RT @JoshyDC: HEALTHWATCH: Gay guys really are thinner, study says - http://bit.ly/c3NxOk //because we are fabulous, bitches!!! // Hmmm… Old Dominion Brewhouse (9th and O NW) has drag shows or a "gay parade" as the adorable hispanic server called it. @slummymummy9 curtsies Thank you, Twitter GF o’ mine. If anyone can find more love to give, it’s you. Domo tag team. 2 against 1: http://twitgoo.com/z24iu @JBizzleRox Guilty until proven innocent. You’re pardoned. @kelkel926 You’re such a sweetheart. I’d love to visit you and take you to dinner and make everyone jealous of me because of my date. If I see you wearing Abercrombie, Hollister, Aeropostale etc. I will automatically assume you are a douche. @extraspecial The best part is I’m an actual farm boy. Why didn’t I think of this sooner? @genstarr blushes @jesserker She’s not! I promise. Like I said…I suck at that game. EFN is dead dead dead tonight. I hear Old Dominion Brewhouse has karaoke on Mondays. I’m about to find out. I once thought that an arrest for indecent exposure equaled celebrity status but APPARENTLY NOT. @asherhuey Yes! Just click on the avatar next to a tweet, look for the gear icon, and select "Favorite" for one you like. @GLITTERGODDESS I spontaneously LOLed because of that. Thank you! @Emarieg Dangit! I hate mulling over what could’ve been tweeted!

Daily Digest for 2010-06-07

Posted by Richard Mankhey

	2:44pm	rmankhey updated their status on Facebook. Richard is a firm believer in throwing money at problems…has he mentioned what a huge problem he can be?
	11:56pm	rmankhey posted 47 tweets on Twitter. (Show Details) @jonesy77 Domo says "Karaoke is for homos." @boogdogDC @DCJono @DCJono Lies & falshoods! I’ve seen bigger. I’m rockin’ the karaoke at Green Lantern with @DCJono and the loverly @jonesy77 is holding court, fabulously as usual. @MikeCTweet You’re such an exhibitionist. I only tweeted that because I’m picking my nose on the bus. I do what I want. No it’s nooooooot: http://twitgoo.com/yyyrp @JosieDC Of course, I’m just joshing. UNRELATED: I just bought a Taser. @adamgriffiths I will have to politely decline on nude sunbathing. I’m a proponent of the Twilight look. @gaypornfanatic Rice in the shirt seems slightly less mysterious than Skittles(TM) in the shoe. I just discussed the appropriateness of a sign that says "Parking In Rear". A coworker says I’m biased. @jesserker Ha! Well put, Jess-burger. @aliholden @drgatewood I can’t be the only one who overtly looks at pornography on crowded trains, can I? Fun times at Green Lantern karaoke last night with @DCJono & the fabulous @jonesy77 who called out "At Bobalouie!" when I was up to sing. It’s going to be an interesting day. Everyone’s acting like they flushed their brains down the toilet. There’s always something nice to say about someone…even if it’s: "Well…he has a nice right foot." No YOU’RE voluntarily listening to that Paris Hilton album. Oh all right…it’s actually me. @kelkel926 You’re so sweet! I’m happy I could give you some giggles. C-: Throwing money at problems is a great solution. Did I mention what a huge problem I can be? Hello new follower @sadironman! I can tell I am going to like your tweets a lot…but not as much as @slummymummy9 ’s. @pjohnson360 Yes. I would & I did. @pjohnson360 My big toe (because yes, it’s that big). @mikesica People often tell me they see dopplegangers of me. I’m the generic version of someone who’s more attractive. I’m expecting a cease and desist letter from my Housing Association anyday now. #gratuitouspublicnudity @jesserker I <3 you like the dickens. You know, we haven’t met up for a post-bday celebration yet. @adamgriffiths I’m prepared to accept full responsibility, but I wouldn’t mind sharing the blame with you. @DrGatewood You’re an exception…exceptionally strange (but lovable all the same). @iamlekeith Thanks, man! beams @jesserker You LOLed twice! Score! I like people like this: http://twitgoo.com/yyyo4 @TheCortez I love how thought-out your nasal spelunking is. RT @iamlekeith: @bobalouie " see this? remember? you were there". // :-O RT @asherhuey: @JosieDC @bobalouie - I die // I die too…but not before YOU die, Josie. @TheCortez Depends. How many fingers are you sticking up in there? @iamlekeith Ditto sugar! @iamlekeith …and what would that caption be? BTW I love your Bio. So good. @aliholden I could be way off. Perhaps it’s even a fetish of some kind? http://www.hotguyspickingtheirnoses.com @boogdogDC The way that brain of yours works, Boogie, I haven’t the slightest! @pockettpatrick @pockettpatrick It was spur of the moment. My apologies! I will let you know next time, PP. Remember those turkeys you drew for T-day by outlining your hand? I can’t wait to celebrate Nat’l Hot Dog Day. I love rainbows: http://twitgoo.com/yz5oo I’m not sure how Skittles(TM) got into my left shoe and I don’t think I want to know. @StraightGay @iamlekeith tears up a little bit @edmontongreg Woo-hoo! @DesignerGuyNY @ChukDC Thanks for the ReTweet, boys! Well isn’t this a little redundant: http://twitgoo.com/yyyp4 RT @davesilverstone: In the Colbert Report waiting room http://twitpic.com/1uvgbh // Nice! I don’t care how cute you are…picking your nose in public decreases your sex appeal by roughly 62%. @boogdogDC Or maybe 150% more fun because he’s a little heftier than I am. @mikesica

Daily Digest for 2010-06-06

Posted by Richard Mankhey

	12:22pm	rmankhey updated their status on Facebook. Richard would like everything on the menu.
	11:02pm	rmankhey posted 58 tweets on Twitter. (Show Details) @FHornChickie So you’re currently lying naked on the floor ‘cuz someone deconstructed your sweater? Awe. Some. You just gotta see this ride: http://twitgoo.com/yl3lu @whosthatgirl2 Hollah! slathers on SPF 50 sunscreen It’s important to practice safe sun when at wine festivals. A cowboy hat helps, also. RT @chrisgeidner: @bobalouie That’s what she said! // I’d ROFL but that’d cause a scene. @pjohnson360 Just got back home from a wine festival. It was quite festive. Many parties in my mouth. @willgallahue Ha! grins That’s not a bad idea at all…I can think of plenty of Tweeps that would work well for. @JosieDC Josie, dear…when it comes to stalkers there ain’t nothing you can do. @pjohnson360 @TextuallyAktive BTW, I totally dig your Twitter handle. Very clever! @FHornChickie Lemme guess…Marilyn Manson is helping you cook? @chrisgeidner Indeed. Six dollah make you hollah! @lwilcher I knew I wasn’t the only one. Let’s start a club. Sometimes I wonder if certain colleges didn’t teach courses like "How To Act Like a Dick in the Real World". @DCdebbie That describes 80% of my wardrobe. @TheCortez @DupontDan Me: "Cracker Barrel isn’t a gay friendly business". Holly: "Cracker Barrel isn’t a stomach-friendly business." Yee-haw! http://twitgoo.com/ymnvk In the land of the blind, only the one-eyed man wears beer goggles. The bathtub: I like it so I put a ring around it. @DCBrent TOIDH @chrisgeidner It’s all about the delivery. @willgallahue Mr. Gallahue, you are a gentleman and a scholar. Of course I’m biased. @edmontongreg I was just talking about it yesterday with a friend. That "pretend you’re doing a shot and spit it in a beer bottle" trick. Excuse me, Sir, but I must commandeer your zamboni. If Jonah Hill gets any fatter Kirstie Alley is gonna get jealous. I’m continually amazed what one can get by simply asking for it. @DCdebbie As an avid practitioner of "If you’ve got it, flaunt it" I knew you would understand. @TheCortez @DupontDan @JBizzleRox giggles Not to be too caustic, but for real! Poor kid. @DrGatewood New avatar? I dig it…then I bury it and shovel the dirt back on top. @boogdogDC Of course. Major points by default. @DCBrent As a former cheerleader, I take pride in the fact that I can bite my own toenails. #flexibilitypaysoff Sharpies(TM) are proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. I’m helping the environment by wearing the same outfit 2 days in a row. You’re welcome, Mother Nature. @boogdogDC Something like that…but not quite. @DCJono Just informed me I hit 16,000 tweets. I’m well on my way to Carpel Tunnel Syndrome. @iamlekeith @Ranity Thank you for the ReTweet and the follow! Where’s my sash & crown? http://tweetphoto.com/25955613 poof @DCJono You’re good with acronyms…I’ll give you a hint…the ‘P’ stands for ‘Pride’. @DrGatewood …because you obviously don’t own one already. @DCJono I told ya you were good at acronyms! @TextuallyAktive I am humbled kind sir. I must give partial credit to the helium tank I travel w/ & inhale frequently. @TextuallyAktive Thanks for the ReTweet! @DrGatewood We’re at about…86% complete insanity. Still downloading. Please wait…I run on a Windows OS. @DrGatewood It rubs the shea butter on its buttocks…. @DrGatewood GMOL (Giggles Maniacally Out Loud) RT @KimW16: Guy. If you aint gay idk what is. // I love it when you tweet about me. @DistrictOfAris Bah. It’s hot outside…and where would I plug in my Roomba(TM)? @ImUrCaligirl As part Scottish and part mailman, I do my best to stay out of the sun. Oh, and I’m made of diamonds. @pjohnson360 No hon, I’m talkin’ ’bout me! http://twitgoo.com/ykzk6 Glitter, glitter everywhere nor any drop to drink. @USFBull82 You’re not just now waking up are you? Cowboy hat is my bad mohawk day remedy. Just walked into Playbill Cafe and "Can’t Fight the Moonlight" came on. Marvelous. @DrGatewood All you need is a little saltpeter on your Wheaties(TM). S.o.P. If I were still using 4Square I’d be pretentiously checking into an expensive Gtown restaurant right now. My toenails grow so fast. I guess I just need to bite them more often. @TheCortez It’s not as hot as your new avatar. @DupontDan

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